Wednesday, June 1, 2011

two blue lines

We made a baby!!

It's crazy how two little blue lines on a stick can have such eternal implications for your life and for the world.  I'm nine weeks pregnant - still early, but we are confessing hope by sharing our news with family and friends. After losing our first baby early in pregnancy (with very few people knowing we were pregnant) we've decided it's much better to have the love, prayers and support from others than to journey, in joy or in grief, alone.

Chris and I have been thinking about 'inaugurated eschatology' this week - living in the reality now of what we know is coming in the future.  Generally it means being people of the new creation - seeking to live in the fullness of God's kingdom reign (righteousness, justice and peace!!), which will someday be, as if it is right now.  

It's like being pregnant.  We know we have to wait for this baby to arrive and we're anticipating his/her coming.  But we don't just go on with life as usual until the baby comes.

We PANIC!!!!

Just kidding. :)  But everything changes.  Not just how I feel (a wee bit sick this time around, and mostly tired), but what I do and the thoughts that fill my mind are completely different after seeing those two blue lines.  We start to prepare, I try to eat better (ice cream, anyone?), we think about baby names, we imagine 2 under 18 months and how we will live and sleep together, I think about nursing a toddler and a baby, we think about money and our little car with two car seats.  You know why?  Because the baby is here already - and yet we're still waiting for the baby to come.

It's like Jesus saying the Kingdom of God is at hand - and yet we still wait with such intense longing for the kingdom's full arrival and the healing it will bring to the world as all things are reconciled.

And that kingdom, like our little baby, is a seed which grows slowly but eventually takes over.  I wrote about that here.

That baby is due in early January.  My dream is to be Mary, great with child, in a Christmas pageant this year. :)


  1. THis was very special to read, thanks for sharing!

  2. AH! Thank you for sharing becca! I am filled with joy and anticipation for your family. : D

  3. i just found you blog... and i'm glad. you are beautiful in every possible implication of the word, and you have a voice that needs to be heard.

    congratulations on your precious little one. being pregnant has got to be one of the most special and profound times. ever. there is just nothing like it in the world. i know you will enjoy it as you should, growing pains and all.

    i love what you wrote about the kingdom being such as your baby. how people who don't know jesus don't see him through pregnancy, birth, and parenthood is beyond me. the wonder of it all it only begins to make sense in him...

    i'm glad you decided to share your news. ryan and i have felt the same with both our pregnancies, though we've never had to endure a loss and i can't quite imagine... being well-aware that many people say to wait to share until you're in the "safe zone" we felt that having the joy and prayer and support of friends was far more important than hiding heartache if it were to come. we want to be open in our joys and trials - makes the joy sweeter and the trials more real... which makes them easier to walk through. (not sure if "easier" is the appropriate word, but nothing else comes to mind.) nothing can be waded through unless it is first made real. and what is the safe zone anyway? statistics, shmatistics, there are a thousand reasons that life is never "safe". always sacred, never safe. and that's ok.

    praying in this moment that your little one becomes all that s/he's meant to be. happy for your growing family. xx