Friday, January 20, 2012

these are learning days.

these are learning days, for all of us. how do we do this, parenting two? we have no idea and no one has been here before, with these two that we've somehow made. the blonde boy with wild hair and a wilder heart; the dark haired girl who sleeps and wakes with such peace, settling so easily, complete grace to us in our learning. if you ask me what I do, i'd say i nurse my children. i nurse them when they wake, i nurse them to sleep. i spend hours on the couch, a toddler and newborn latched on, held close to the place where they both grew inside, admiring each other from the perfect distance, learning each other and how to be friends. sometimes it requires a bit of acrobatics and patience, other times its easy, like we were made for this. the more i accept this as my most important job, the easier it is.

we're learning to 're-connect to correct' with our son, who's world has massively shifted without his consent. he will thank us later, i know that for sure. he loves the baby but needs to know he's still welcome - in our arms, laps, his voice heard and his giggles appreciated. he's just a baby, our toddler-baby, and he doesn't suddenly become less dependent just because someone smaller comes along.

and we are learning to be married still, even with days that are long and evenings short and our own bedtimes sooner than normal. we are learning to pray, for our children and ourselves - not because we are supposed to, but because we have no other way to survive.

we sleep in separate rooms right now, each with our own babe to care for; we've never been closer, i reckon, never appreciated or clung to each other more.

these are learning days, for all of us. the more we accept this, the easier it is.


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